It’s relatable that Jesus often withdrew to solitary places to pray, but everyone was always looking for him. Isn’t it hard to get alone? Our time with God is interrupted by a small child—who should be napping—who “desperately needs” water. Or we are really starting to get into prayer when someone shouts out from another room, “Can someone please give me a hand?” Or you are nestling into a perfect stillness, communing quietly, when your two roommates start bickering about something dumb. It’s nice to know Jesus too struggled to get alone! He had to hide himself from people but sometimes they would find Him!
And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed. And Simon and those who were with him searched for him, and they found him and said to him, "Everyone is looking for you."
—Mark 1:35-37
I’m sure Jesus learned to pray amidst the crowds and living with people, but he often withdrew to desolate places to engage in a certain kind of praying called “wrestling.” We see a snapshot of this in the Gospel accounts as Jesus prays in the Garden of Gethsemane:
And being in agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground.
—Luke 22:44
Writing prayers in a journal is an excellent discipline. Slowly reading and musing on the Scriptures is another sweet practice. Shooting up little prayers throughout the day is also good. But there are certain heights in God that can only be attained as we follow Christ into the anguish of his Garden praying. Hebrews describes the prayer life of Jesus like this:
In the days of his flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.
—Hebrews 5:7
Have you ever heard someone pray like this? It’s interesting to note that you don’t see the disciples in the Gospel accounts ever praying with Jesus. You get the idea that they sometimes listened at a distance to the Lord praying, but I think the intensity of heart that He prayed with was something that mystified them. Perhaps that’s why they approached Jesus at one point and said, “Lord, teach us to pray” (Luke 11).
Portraits
When I lived in New York City as a new Christian my wife and I attended a large church in Times Square. My job at Berlitz (language school) was near the church. My hours at Berlitz were wonky so some days I’d work maybe 8-10 in the morning and then later in the day 1-4. This gave me the opportunity in between teaching to spend time alone in prayer at the church. Often when I did that there was only a door person in sight out in the foyer. The sanctuary would be empty. But I’d hear in the faint distance, coming from the bellows of the basement, the impassioned prayers of Charles Simpson who was the prayer pastor on staff. The prayers were loud, fervent, flowing, persistent wails that sounded more like war cries. He was wrestling.
This wrestling in the closet of prayer is what Paul described a fellow minister named Epaphras as doing in his letter to the Colossians:
Epaphras, who is one of you, a servant of Christ Jesus, greets you, always struggling on your behalf in his prayers, that you may stand mature and fully assured in all the will of God.
—Colossians 4:12
The NIV uses the word “wrestling” instead of “struggling.” Either way, you get the idea he was earnestly laboring in praying for others!
But who exactly are we wrestling with? Is it an angel? As with Jacob. Are we wrestling with God? Paul in Ephesians 6 tells us who we are wrestling against:
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.
—Ephesians 6:10-12
When we set our hearts to seek the Lord, there will be resistance. Unseen forces in spiritual realms rise up to confront us when we start threatening what Satan controls. This is war.
It makes me think of Daniel who labored in prayer, mourning and fasting. The word that came to Daniel was that “the Prince of Persia withstood me 21 days.” This is hard to understand, but what we know is that there was some sort of wrestling match in the heavenly realm between God's Angel and a demon that coincided with Daniel's prayers. In Daniel 10 Daniel says he was in anguish for three weeks—21 days!
What I'm saying is that prayer is an engagement in an unseen war. And this kind of praying is different from quiet communion in the Word, writing, singing, and even prayer with others. This is a wrestling match in the secret closet.
Go hide yourself
I want to set forth a challenge. Carve out time this week to wrestle. Whether you've experienced this before or not doesn't matter. Even if you are a person who believes in God but does not have the Spirit in you yet, this kind of prayer is often exactly what precedes the filling of the Spirit. The important thing is to come honest and humble to the Lord.
This kind of praying requires being in a place completely alone. Many of us spend our time with God amidst a house full of people. Or we write prayers at a cafe. This is fine for certain praying, but wrestling prayer requires solitude. Here are a few suggestions to help.
If you live with nice people then you can ask them not to interrupt you for a certain block of time. Or hide yourself in the basement. Or maybe go up on the roof.
A better plan is to pray at a time that your housemates are not home. Or do it early in the morning, when they are sound asleep.
The best way to practice wrestling is to physically get away. What works best for me is to get in my “sanctuary on wheels'' and drive to one of my many desolate places around Rhode Island. When I get to my place of solitude I get out and usually pace back and forth, crying out loud to the Lord. For these special sessions of prayer, I also try to carve a generous amount of time so I'm not rushed.
I admit this kind of praying is not easy—and I don’t do it enough! I can feel the spiritual resistance. It's a fight. I struggle to find words, I run out of words. I may become weak and without strength and can only be still or groan. Sometimes I just weep. The result of these extended pleadings is not always immediate, but it is always effective. So I challenge you to “go hide yourself” (1 Kings 17:3) and pour out your soul. Watch what God will do!
Pastor Scott