If you are one of those naturally happy-go-lucky people who never gets discouraged, you may find today’s letter unrelatable. I’m writing today for all my friends out there with a bend toward melancholy. You know who you are. You get easily discouraged and even depressed at times. I’m with you.
My disposition is especially weird because part of me is an extreme idealist. I’m a dreamer and relentless optimist. But, then, the other part of me has this propensity to be moody and feel downcast. As you might guess, the two compliment each other in a strange way. When my lofty spiritual dreams are not being reached I am extra sad about it :/
Music
One of the ways we know we have this disposition toward being blue is by the music we are drawn to. I’ve always liked a wide variety of music, but I remember certain sounds as a teen that seemed to be singing the song of my soul. Music is interesting like that. We listen to one song and it does nothing for us, and then listen to another song, and it seems to be speaking the language of what we are feeling inside. The album Unforgettable Fire by U2 comes to mind or The Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd. I wore those records out in my youth.
Feeling blue has positive elements like helping creativity, deepening empathy and enabling the development of a thought life. But it definitely has a dark side. It can easily, and even quickly, spiral us into a place of despondency. Sometimes I feel like there are two demons assigned to my life named Fear and Discouragement. They seem to follow me everywhere and never leave me alone!
One-two punch
The way the enemy often does his dirty work to discourage us can be illustrated by the one-two punch in boxing. The first punch is intended to get your opponent to be off balance or to drop his arms lower to block the punch. This prepares the way for the second punch which is usually a strong blow right in the face—with the hope of knocking the guy to the floor.
Satan operates in a similar way. The first punch is a reason to be discouraged that hits us pretty hard. It could be any number of reasons: we have failing health, someone is mad at us, we made a mistake at work, we can’t pay our bills, we are tired, we are struggling with a sin. It’s the second punch that can knock us out though. While we are reeling from the first punch, the second punch hits us square in the kisser with the idea that we are terrible Christians for even feeling discouraged. Am I right? He tries to make us feel discouraged about being discouraged. Ah!
In good company
Thank God for the Scriptures and the countless stories of godly people who experienced discouragement. We could argue that King David was playing the blues long before any of the famous blues artists we know. So many of his psalms were dripping with melancholy, anguish and despair. And then there’s Elijah who was so despondent he wanted his life to end. Jonah too felt like that. Job wasn’t exactly a glass-is-half-full kind of person. If we struggle with feeling low, we are in good company with some of the greatest saints of the Bible, as well as, church history.
I’m not saying that discouragement is no big deal. Nothing puts a wet blanket over the fire of our devotion to God like a deep feeling of sadness. The disciples in the Garden were described as “exhausted with sorrow.” That’s the dangerous effect of being despondent: it depletes our energy. It can sap our strength so we have no motivation to pursue the Lord. We know we can’t just carelessly float downstream in our depression. But what can we do?
It’s a fight
I want to be careful here not to oversimplify how to climb out of a funk of discouragement. It has never been easy for me. Even now, after being a Christian for over 30 years, I still find it hard to shake off the demon of discouragement. It’s a fight. I wish I could tell you that all you need to do is whip out a few Bible promises and the discouragement suddenly whimpers, puts his tail down, and scurries away.
Discouragement is complex and layered. It seems to sneak into our minds when we aren’t paying attention. It’s not dealt with in a five minute prayer. I’ve carried discouragement for days, weeks and months. I’ve carried some discouragements for years. We learn to keep moving forward even with our heaviness—but we want this thing off our back! Many discouragements come with powerful reasons behind them. Sometimes the reasons are lies but oftentimes they are facts, or at least possibilities. For example—
You are ugly
You are unintelligent
You are not spiritual
Your body is failing
You will never find a spouse
You’ll never have children
You will die young
That person hates you
These people don’t accept you
You aren’t good at what you do
You are in bondage to that thing
You will never be free
You are socially awkward
Confront them!
Again, some reasons behind discouragement are lies, some are facts and some are possibilities. Instead of ignoring the reasons—uncover them. Deal with them head on. Take the reason straight to the Lord, spread it out before Him, and talk it through. Go to Scripture, and see what it says. Often, the Lord helps us to rest in our circumstances as we trust in His strange sovereign plan.
When discouragement comes without any clear reason, I personally find it much harder to battle against. It’s just a vague feeling of dread, a melancholy shadow cast over us. There’s no apparent sense to it. We even list out 100 reasons why we should be the happiest person on the planet, but, for some mysterious reason, “we just aren’t feelin it.” I wonder sometimes what is happening in the spiritual realm during these times. Maybe it’s not one small demon annoyingly shooting his stupid reason at us over and over. Maybe it’s a whole mess of demons that somehow create a cloud of heaviness over us. Who knows?
Don’t let it go
I don’t really care what it is, and if it’s a demon or a gang of demons—I just want discouragement lifted! I’ve heard well-intentioned people, even pastors, tell us that if we are discouraged we just need to grab a hold of a promise. There’s truth to this but the way they say it makes it seem like it’ll take about 60 seconds. The best counsel is to lay hold of a promise and don’t let it go until you get it. It doesn’t have to be one promise. It can be two or three or several. Or a whole chapter. But the way to overcome discouragement is to take a promise and pray over it until it seeps into your heart. I’ll leave you with one example.
Why do you say, O Jacob, and speak, O Israel, “My way is hidden from the LORD, and my right is disregarded by my God”? Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:27-31)
Don’t just read it. Don’t just post it on Instagram. Don’t just make it your screensaver. Eat it. Chew it, swallow it and spit it up and chew it some more. It’s called “chewing the cud” right? It’s what cows do. I know, it’s pretty gross. But you get the point. Make the promise yours. My goodness, don’t just memorize it. That’s good but light the thing on fire inside of you. Steep in it. Pray over it until the Spirit Himself quickens it (as the old saints say). Don’t let that demon of discouragement get comfortable in the living room of your heart. Preach the promises of God to your soul until he can’t take it anymore.