Growing up I was pretty average, or at least felt average. Average in looks. Average in academics. Average in sports. Average musically. Average in social skills. Being average, and probably thinking of myself as less-than-average, made it feel impossible to “go out with” (term for dating in the ’80s) any of the beautiful girls in my school. But every once in a while—perhaps by an unseen movement of divine mercy—I would find out that a really beautiful girl was crazy about me. The whole world seemed instantly charged with fresh energy.
Before I knew how this girl felt about me, I would not dare talk with her. I would only admire her from a distance. But after I found out she had feelings for me, well, that changed everything. I wanted to see her in the hallway. I wanted to get near her. I wanted to get to know her. In fact, I found myself looking forward to any kind of interaction with her. When I wasn’t with her I was even anticipating the next encounter.
That’s how we respond to love. It’s not just in romantic relationships but all relationships. Think about people you know that tolerate you, criticize you or don’t seem to like you very much. Do you want to be around them? No. We may have to be around them because we work or live with them, but we don’t enjoy it; we just push through it. But when we are around someone who adores us and loves us with strong affection, we love spending time with them. We can’t wait! This is a universal principle of human relationships.
Expanding on this principle further, when we are with someone who doesn’t seem to like us very much, we keep our heart sealed. We converse but only in a shallow way. We don’t open up about anything vulnerable. But when we are with someone who deeply loves us, despite our many flaws, it has a way of opening us up. We find ourselves pouring out things we didn’t even know were in us. Love has that effect on us.
Perception of God
How we perceive God has a direct effect on how we relate to Him. If we think of God as annoyed with us, tired of us, tolerating us or just not that interested in us, it will affect us profoundly. We may still talk with him, but we do it nervously and fearfully. We talk to Him in a formal manner. We may wonder if it’s better to not bother Him. The point I’m making is that misconceptions about God will strain your prayer life to the point of dread.
But when you begin to understand that God is crazy about you, well, it changes everything. You want to be around Him. You want to experience His embrace. You want to hear His words of affirmation and affection. The perception of God as loving us with a steadfast love and pursuing relationship with us is the supreme motivating force that drives us to draw near to Him!
The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing. —Zephaniah 3:17
Yeah, but, doesn’t God get angry with people in the Bible? Doesn’t God judge His own people at times with fierce judgments? How can we reconcile this love of God with the severity of God? It can be confusing, right?—especially if we are the sort of person that is keenly aware of our selfishness, our pride, our ingratitude, our apathy, and every other thing in us not like Christ. Why in the world would God love a sinful creature like me? We may never fully understand why He chose to love sinful creatures. All we know is that He does.
The Gospel
It’s interesting to observe that almost all religions in the world relate to God (or the gods) in a similar way: with shame and fear. They go through rituals, make sacrificial offerings, pray and fast, all to appease the object of their worship. Some even cut themselves to get God to answer.
And they (prophets of Baal) cried aloud and cut themselves after their custom with swords and lances, until the blood gushed out upon them. And as midday passed, they raved on until the time of the offering of the oblation, but there was no voice. No one answered; no one paid attention. —1 Kings 18:28-29
Religious people bow and beg, grovel and cry, in their feelings of unworth. They never feel like they are doing enough to satisfy their Maker. The relationship is like a guilty peasant coming before an angry King. But the One True God and His Glorious Gospel are completely different.
God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. —Romans 5:8
If we are going to have a prayer life that is free, intimate and delightful we must grow in our understanding of the love of God. Even if we’ve sinned more than most people have sinned, He loves us and wants us. Even if we feel flawed in dozens of ways and struggle constantly against sin in our lives, His heart burns with love for us. The love of God is hard to comprehend. There is nothing to compare it to. We could compare it to the unconditional love of the best kind of earthly dad perhaps—but the love of God is something way beyond that!
The LORD is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. The LORD is good to all, and his mercy is over all that he has made. —Psalm 145:8-9
Furious love
Before God made the world He knew what would happen. It didn’t surprise Him that Adam and Eve fell into sin and the whole world became corrupt. God knew that the price to redeem us would be the sacrificial death of Jesus. He knew that many would reject Him. He knew that even those who received Him would struggle with sins. He knew all of this beforehand.
That’s what is so mind-blowing about the love of God! The love of Christ is a furious love that “came not to be served but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many”—so that we could be with Him forever! Oh, He may get angry with His creation but ultimately He does not want any to perish. He created us for relationship with Him. He is pursuing us!
For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith-that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. —Ephesians 3:14-19
I’m praying for each of you that the love of God would be made real to your heart by the power of the Holy Spirit. That you’d grasp the affection of the Father. I’m praying that you would hear God calling you to enjoy freedom and intimacy in the Father’s arms. It’ll change everything.